Do you know that horrible moment when you are stuck in past and everyone around seems to be moving on so rapidly? And no matter how hard you try you just cannot keep up with the world. I seem to know that feeling all too well. Sometimes I feel like there is no one to talk to and that there is no one in this world that will ever understand me and no matter how hard I try… I just do not fit in.
Do you ever feel like you have been shut out from the whole of society? Like they are all happily sitting together and you’re just standing outside in the rain wishing you were part of it? Just when you lose all hope out of nowhere you see someone smile at you and it makes you feel like you’re not alone then you realise that smile wasn’t meant for you…
I’ve been feeling like that for most of my life and I think I know why.
When we are children we make attachments to our parents or the people we spend most of our time with and their behaviour towards us becomes the template of our social life in the future. The different attachment types determine what kind of person you will become when you are older. I seemed to have the one type of attachment that 15% of the population have which is called Insecure: Anxious Avoidant or detached. I thought I was normal but after finding out about this attachment type I have realized why I am the way I am. I can’t trust people very easily which is why I tend to spend more time on my own. I feel very anxious about what people may think of me so I keep myself to myself.
Maybe my attachment type isn’t the reason i don’t trust people easily though, maybe i was just born that way.